Help! Is Love a Decision or Not?

Hello there lovely readers!

I would very much love to hear your opinion on the topic: love is a decision, yes or no?

This is because we will be having a debate about this tomorrow already, and I am more than eager to know what your stand here is.

For my group and I’s three main points, here they are:

1. You do not choose who you will fall in love with. You do not decide your own love story, the setting and the main character who will be beside you. Love just simply comes, whether you are ready or not.

Under this, is the fact that you cannot force yourself to love someone just because you want the idea of love, yoy want to know what love is, experience it and love someone. It is not that simple.

2. People say that we have standards, what our types are, and even though that may seem like a conscious choice, historically speaking, it is not. Our “standards” are born from our innate instincts that is centuries old which we got from our ancestors. We are always subconsciouly looking for something in someone, and when we find that, whether we know it or not, we start to love that person, and thus, you may think that you chose this person because he is this and that, it still is something that you found beautiful (be it flaws or strengths) from your innate ideas. 

We don’t even have to go far in history because as we grow up, a lot of factors influence who we were, what we are now and who will be. Genetics influence us, our families, friends, even books influence us. For example, we first learn of love at home, through our mothers and fathers. And that carries through with who we choose to love in our lives, and Science has proven this yet again and again with how people get attracted to someone, that later blossoms into love, without deciding to love at all because it just comes.

3. Last point is yet another Scientific approach that love is just the release of hormones by chemical reactions in our bodies. The combination of traits that we find in another person is what triggers the brain to produce hormone secretions that results as to why your heart seems to skip a bit and you just feel so happy whenever the person you “love” is around.

Counter-arguments

In any debate, one has to know both sides of the argument after all, and so far, these are the ideas that we came up with:

1. Love does not blossom until you first notice feelings, and once you do, you decide whether to pursue it or not, to bring it to the light or not.

2. Falling in love is easy, staying in love is hard and that is where one decides whether they should continue loving or not.

3. When a girl (I do not know the exact limitations of our debate yet, so anything can happen) is raped and becomes pregnant, that girl can decide whether to love that child she carries or be just a heart-breaking reminder of her past.

4. You choose who you love because everyone has standards on the person that they want.

5.  We had more counter-arguments but because I want to hear your side now, I’ll cut it short.

Lots of love,

Meiji 

 ❤

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